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Saturday, August 15, 2009

I WANT TO BE IN CHARGE OF THE DEATH PANEL


I have heard talk from the talk radio scum and weenie-bloggers that the President's health care plan includes something called a "DEATH PANEL." I like this concept and would like to volunteer my services to be DEATH MASTER GENERAL (Kind of like Post Master General).

I already have been thinking of some people that I would do-away with first in an effort to bring down the cost of health care and make the United States a much more livable place.

  • People who refer to the President's health care plan as Obama-care.
  • The host of most Fox News shows (I think Bill O'Rielly, Sean Hannity and Glen Beck could be used for strange medical experiments).
  • People who think that the parking lot of Chilli's and Entertain Mart in Springfield is a street.
  • Women who play the "Chicken Fried" by Zac Brown Band on the juke box at Buffalo Wild Wings.
  • All right-wing talk radio show host, Tea-Baggers and Birthers.
  • High paid CEO's (especially in the radio industry)
  • Guys who call Jock 98.7 to complain about the Illusion's Gentleman's Club commercials with Chuck Booms.
  • Anyone who uses the word "socialist" or "socialism" as an insult.
  • People who use Bluetooth.
  • People on Facebook who want you to sign a petition against a national holiday for Michael Jackson.
  • Guys who like Sarah Palin more than Paris Hilton.

Don't worry, I'll think of more. I think that a Death Panel could be a good idea, but of course, opinions like these are what make me the SUPER-VILLAIN OF THE OZARKS!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!





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