WHY I STOPPED TALKING ABOUT POLITICS AND NEWS

Someone sent me an e-mail asking why I wasn't posting anything about politics. Andy Cline of Rhetorica once said I wrote some of the best satire of anyone. He was one of the few who liked it.
Not only were there many people in the Ozarks who didn't like it. I received many death threats, mainly from an idiot at Mansfield, Mo. The main problem was some people in the local media, including co-workers, who didn't like it. They felt I made fun of the wrong people or things. I've been told I've been blacklisted by at least one of the radio clusters here in Springfield (Clear Channel). The co-workers who didn't like my opinions went to management and tried to get me fired.
I should note that I'm not angry about the state of the country like I was when I first started the old blog, however, I am not happy with the state of the Ozarks. I may never be. I've hated the Ozarks since I was in elementary school.
I have figured out that nothing makes Ozarkers more upset than someone having fun, being entertained and not griping about politics. So that is what I am doing with my current blog. I'm entertaining people.  I'm much happier and I'm having fun. The response is much slower but has always been very positive. That is what I like.

VOID IN MISSOURI

The passing of Proposition C proves what I have thought ever since I was a small boy: Missouri is an awful place to live because it is filled with stupid people (pictured above).

Proposition C is just another chapter in the long and idiotic history of Missouri trying to keep any "evil" outside influence from crossing out state line.

I first became aware of this asinine practice of Missouri lawmakers when I was a child. You would see the words VOID IN MISSOURI in fine print. This meant that some stupid adult in Jefferson City was going to keep you from getting a neat prize or having any fun. You would see and ad in a comic book for a cool contest or offer for something you couldn't get at Wal-mart or Mattinglys 5 & 10, but at the bottom of the ad was the dreaded VOID IN MISSOURI.

"Win a Trip to Disney World" VOID IN MISSOURI!

"Win a Pool Party with Charlie's Angels" VOID IN MISSOURI!

"Win the Chance to Go On Tour with Kiss!" VOID IN MISSOURI!

"Win a Visit from Mork from Ork to Your School!" VOID IN MISSOURI!

"Win Every Marvel Comic Book Ever Published" VOID IN MISSOURI!

"Win Your Own Private McDonalds" VOID IN MISSOURI!

It wasn't only contest. There were even things for sale that were VOID IN MISSOURI! I remember having to give my sister's address in Oklahoma, just to order a Star Wars t-shirt. Apparently some nitwit in Jefferson City felt threatened by a skinny eight year old in Lebanon wearing a t-shirt with R2D2 and C3PO. A dollar to donuts says that the idiot that came up with the VOID IN MISSOURI law was elected by voters in Greene and Christian County (pictured above).

Much of this garbage comes from a group of privileged individuals who can control what rules are made from the State of Missouri down to the local school board. They make rules that punish people like me. Since they have the money and power, they want all the good stuff to be available to people with money and power. In Missouri, and the Ozarks especially, you only get to do something if your family is Republican or your family is Southern Baptist. They also like to require you to have good grades in elementary or high school (Good grades in college don't count - this called the Rush Limbaugh clause).

So now the idiotic voters in Missouri are going to keep the President's health care plan out of the hands of Missouri residents. It is like I'm eight years old all over again. Not only do I not have enough health insurance, but I also haven't met Mork, Kiss, Charlie's Angels nor do I own every Marvel comic book or a McDonalds. I hope all the stupid conservative hillbillies who voted "yes" on Proposition C get a major disease! (The people who voted "yes" on Proposition C are pictured above)

Of course, opinions, like these, are why I'm considered the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

BLOG NET NEWS IS GONE

The Turner Report: Blog Net News bites the dust

I knew it wasn't long for this world when I made the Top 10 two weeks in a row.

CONAN O'BRIEN NOMINATED FOR 4 EMMY AWARDS AFTER BEING SCREWED BY NBC

CNN has a story on the Emmy nominations, which were announced today. In an ironic turn of events, "The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien" was nominated for 4 Emmy awards, even thought NBC replaced him after only seven months with the previous host Jay Leno. This isn't anything new, both Bob Newhart's 1060 variety show and the Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour received Emmy awards after being cancelled, but four nominations must be a record.

Conan said "Congrats to my staff on 4 Emmy nominations. This bodes well for the future of The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien."

Congratulations to Conan, however, I feel David Letterman should receive a special Emmy for all those jokes he has made about George W. Bush and Sarah Palin. If not an Emmy, at least a Congressional Medal of Honor or rename Missouri "Lettermanland."

Of course, opinions, like this one, are why I'm considered the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

NO MORE FRAIZER GLENN MILLER RADIO ADS

The Missouri Broadcasters Association issued a statement this evening on the on-going battle with hate-monger and supposed "write-in" U.S. Senate candidate Fraizer Glenn Miller. Miller was buying radio ads on Missouri radio stations. He was claiming that since he was a U.S. Senate candidate that the radio stations had to sell him ad time.

MBA and Missouri Attorney General Chris Koster filed a request for a declaratory ruling from the FCC on the matter.

"On Friday, June 18, 2010, the Missouri Broadcasters Association was advised by telephone that the FCC’s response to its petition would be in the form of informal, oral advice. The advice was received from the Media Bureau’s Policy Division staff. The advice was that, on the facts and pleading submitted by all parties, including Mr. Miller, it would not be unreasonable for Missouri broadcasting stations to determine that Miller is not a bona fide write-in candidate and therefore, Missouri broadcasters may deny him access to broadcast their stations.

This advice is an affirmation of the position taken by the MBA, Attorney General Koster and Zimmer Broadcasting and the FCC, prior to the filing of our petition. It confirms that a broadcaster who decides that Miller has not established himself to be a bona fide write-in candidate would not be acting unreasonably. Therefore, in our view, a Missouri broadcaster would not be held liable for having denied access retroactively.

The MBA continues to believe that Mr. Miller’s demands for mandatory access were an abuse of the privilege contained in the Communications Act for bona fide candidates. The Communications Act creates a special mandatory-access rule only for federal candidates, carefully limited to party nominees and those who are “bona fide,” or active and credible in the circumstances of the particular race. This result validates the MBA’s position in its petition and reply comments that Miller has not established himself to be a bona fide candidate. Miller is merely attempting to use broadcasters as a megaphone for his message, and broadcasters are not required to allow themselves to be used as a purveyor of personal views merely upon the claim of candidacy for federal office."

CAN I GET AN AMEN AND A HALLELUJAH, BROTHERS AND SISTER!!!

But Virginia Is For Lovers & We Are The QUEEN CITY

MSNBC has a story about how the governor of South Carolina and others are upset about these ads which appeared around the time of the Gay Pride festivities in the U.K. and elsewhere. A state tourism employee resigned over this. I doubt any gay people wanted to visit Civil War battlefields in South Carolina. There is also the language barrier because this turned off many junior high kids who read "South Carolina Is So Gay" and thought "South Carolina is boring stuff my parents would like."

Personally, I think Amro Worldwide should partner with Springfield Convention and Visitors Bureau. The posters can read "THEY DON'T CALL US THE QUEEN CITY FOR NOTHING!"