WHY I STOPPED TALKING ABOUT POLITICS AND NEWS

Someone sent me an e-mail asking why I wasn't posting anything about politics. Andy Cline of Rhetorica once said I wrote some of the best satire of anyone. He was one of the few who liked it.
Not only were there many people in the Ozarks who didn't like it. I received many death threats, mainly from an idiot at Mansfield, Mo. The main problem was some people in the local media, including co-workers, who didn't like it. They felt I made fun of the wrong people or things. I've been told I've been blacklisted by at least one of the radio clusters here in Springfield (Clear Channel). The co-workers who didn't like my opinions went to management and tried to get me fired.
I should note that I'm not angry about the state of the country like I was when I first started the old blog, however, I am not happy with the state of the Ozarks. I may never be. I've hated the Ozarks since I was in elementary school.
I have figured out that nothing makes Ozarkers more upset than someone having fun, being entertained and not griping about politics. So that is what I am doing with my current blog. I'm entertaining people.  I'm much happier and I'm having fun. The response is much slower but has always been very positive. That is what I like.

DESDINOVA & HIS TWIN BROTHER ARE ON THE BEACH

I just wanted you readers to know that I and my "good twin brother" have exiled ourselves to the beach, as they say in the industry.

Also look for a change in this blog. We have been looking at trends in other blogs (such as Retrospace and Neato Coolville), as well as what post on this site have been most popular. We have decided that a change may take place.

There are many great blogs covering local and national news. I can't keep up, so I will be shifting my focus away from that stuff and focusing on entertainment and pop culture. Of course, when a person focuses on pop culture and entertainment, Ozarkers get upset. As you know, I LOVE TO UPSET OZARKERS!

CLYDE CLIFFORD'S BEAKER STREET TO LEAVE THE AIRWAVES

Clyde Clifford and Beaker Street are not just Arkansas radio legends, but legends in the Midwest and Southern part of the United States. Sadly, Clyde Clifford has been told by the management of KKPT that his last show will be on Feb. 6, 2011.

Beaker Street was one of the many radio shows that inspired me to get into radio. I used it as a model for my "Psychedelic Limits" segment of the Midnite Snack on KSMU in the late 80s.

Unfortunately, radio does no longer understands the value programs like Beaker Street and Clyde Clifford. Most people in radio management these days prefer talk shows hosted by sleazy financial advisers and right-wing, conservative, hate mongers or infomercials dangerous weight loss supplements and "auctions' for stuff that used to be given away as prizes to "the fifth caller."

Of course, opinions, like this one, is why I'm considered the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

First a short interview with Clyde Clifford during a show. It was conducted by a reporter from KUAR.



Next an aircheck of the original KAAY Beaker Street show. The aircheck is from the early 70s. It is 13 O'clock on Krune-day, 55th of Bloong. Heavy, man!

SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT THESE "MARRIED" SPRINGFIELD BOYS

This post will probably upset most of Springfield, but I feel this needs to be brought out into the open. Some of the other bloggers, such as Busplunge and Fat Jack, have brought this up in various post and it always produces a flurry of negative comments from those on the right (Usually that little punk named Jeremy). I don't allow comments, so I feel safe. I have noticed, while eating at a pizza buffett here in town, that there are a great number of attractive women married to upwardly mobile men who are closeted gay.

I know what you people are going to do. You will start saying I'm an evil person for suggesting this, but I'm observing this more and more in our community. You will see a whole group of families at a restaurant. The children will be eating and playing. The mothers will be swapping "mommy talk." While all of this going on, these lovely ladies' husbands are winking at each other, between yelling at the kids and talking about sports. Before anyone says it is my imagination, I want to point out that, at some point, one of these "family" men will say to another one (in a high feminine voice) "This chocolate chip pizza is to dddiiiieee for!"

They have all the trappings of being the kind of men that talk radio show host and News Leader letter writers think everyone should be. They drive an Escalade plastered with a McCain-Palin sticker and a "Support the Troops" magnet. They are wearing T-shirts with religious theme or a sports team logo on them. However, these guys act like their wives are a just a person who came along for the ride. No hugging, kissing or hand holding. She is just a kid wrangler.

I firmly believe there is a secret network of conservative groups and churches in this community that fix successful, gay Republican men up with attractive "beards" looking for a meal-ticket. They may have connections to some national groups.

I've noticed several ways to tell if a guy is one of these closeted-gay-conservative-family-guys-married-to-an-attractive-woman.

1. They call sports talk radio and whine about how people making fun of Tim Tebow.

2. They cry along with Glenn Beck.

3. They can't get their Blue-Ray DVD of Avatar to work in their DVD player and blame "liberals in Hollywood" for this.

4. They trash poetry books by MSU professors on their blog.

5. They are offended by Katy Perry’s "I Kissed a Girl."

6. They won't bring their wife's fudge to the office cookie swap at Christmas because they fear being labeled a "fudge packer."

7. They talk about how they think Sarah Palin is more attractive than Paris Hilton. They also think Dr. Laura is more attractive than Kim Kardashian.

8. They have a phobia about pink toothbrushes.

9. They tell people their occupation is a venture capitalist.

10. They have referred to Scott Brown as a "hottie."

Personally, I think someone should just let these guys be gay. These attractive women could be better suited with a guy like me. It looks like someone could find me an attractive wife. I may not be a Republican, from a well-to-do family or have a successful business, but I AM HETEROSEXUAL.

Of course, opinions like these are why I'm considered the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

THE DEVIL MAKES OZARKERS BE CHEAP

I've talked to several restaurant servers and coffee braristas in Springfield, who are complaining about a self-righteous and mean spirited (no pun intended) trend. There are some Ozarkers are not leaving their servers a monetary tip. Instead they are leaving religious tracks.

A few years ago, there was a report that came out saying that Springfield, Missouri was in the Top Ten of the worst tipping cities. These people work hard for very little money. They depend on tips to get by.

Also, Jesus would not approve of your greed, you Pharisees. Of course, opinions like this are why I'm the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

THE YOUNGER GENERATION OF MEN WORRY ME

I never thought I would say this, I’m worried about our country’s future when I see some of the local young people.

I frequent a popular chain restaurant, which is a favorite of people in their late teens and early twenties. The young women don’t bother me very much. Matter of fact most of them seem like fun. It is the young men. They are goobers.

First off, why are they going out in Carhartt overalls? Those are what you wear when you are working, not when you are out cruising for babes. They also have beards like Mennonites or Amish men. What is up with that? They also all have John Deere caps. Do these people want to be farmers?

These guys don’t seem to be paying attention to the ladies around them. They are watching whatever Fox Sports or ESPN on the ten or so large screen TVs, or they playing Golden Tee. I’m afraid these guys are the same kind of idiots who would prefer Sarah Palin over Paris Hilton.

These boys have no taste in music. They seem to love to play a horrible song called “Chicken Fried” on the Touch Tones juke box. This has to be the worst song ever written. If they aren’t playing that song, it is Darrell Worrley, Toby Keith, Blake Shelton or Tim McGraw. I get so disgusted hearing this garbage, that I have to pump several dollars into the juke box so I can hear some music I like. Why can’t these guys like Van Halen, Sex Pistols, Nirvana and Ozzy like I did when I was their age?

These stupid young guys also are fans of talk radio. As you all know I hate talk radio with a passion. I even hate that more than country music. These guys are like most of the sleeze bag, talk radio host they label anything they don’t like as “socialism.” Everything from Obama’s health care reform and gun control to Espresso and Twilight gets called “socialism” by these intellectually challenged doofuses.

I'm not sure what caused these kids to be this way. The only thing I can think of is the crazy parents who home schooled their kids in the 90's. I'm sure some Ozarkers want young people to be this way. I DON'T! I WANT THEM TO BE LIKE ME! All I know is I fear these guys will be running things in a few years. Hopefully, I can take over the world before then. Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

I STARTED BEING THIS WAY IN KINDERGARTEN

I wanted to mention the passing of a wonderful lady. Her name was Edythe Miller and she was my kindergarten in Lebanon, MO. She made going to school fun and comfortable for children entering the scary world of public education (and Mark Twain Elementary could be very scary at times). Mrs. Miller had a elaborate costume for every holiday or special event. She wore everything from a bunny outfit at Easter to a Betsy Ross outfit for the Bicentennial. At the end of every school day she kissed every child on their way out the door. It didn't matter if they were rich or poor, clean or dirty, sick or healthy, white or black. They got a goodbye kiss.

One of the things you have to learn in kindergarten is left and right. When it came time to be tested, I got the answers wrong and she calmly corrected me. In my typical style I announced to Mrs. Miller, "I have decided that from now on things shall be changed. The right is now the left and the left is right. We will all adhere to the change at once!"

Mrs. Miller handled this gracefully. She didn't smack me around or pummel me into the ground, as the other teachers at Mark Twain Elementary would have done. She just wrote a note to my parents on my report card "You son expresses strong opinions."

And it is those "strong opinions" that make me the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

BETTER THAN STEALING CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS

There was a form on a Dominoes Pizza box for a Jackie Stiles Basketball Clinic. I thought I would sign up one of her biggest fans. Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I'M A VILLAIN BUT SHE IS A HERO???

There was an incredibly stupid letter in the Springfield News Leader a few days ago by a woman who bragged about deleting her kids MySpace and Facebook accounts. There were people in the comments section saying "Good for you," "Way to go," and "I applaud you stance."

This is what is wrong with Springfield and the Ozarks. A woman who deletes her kids MySpace and Facebook friends is considered a hero, but anonymous blogger who pokes fun at talk radio scumbags, weenie-bloggers, tea-baggers, right-wingers and cranky adults is considered "a bad guy." This is another example of what I call Ozarks Correctness.

Personally, I think what this woman did is CHILD ABUSE, just like not allowing you kids to watch cartoons or listen to rock music. They should put people like this in prison. Of course, opinions like this are why I'm considered the SUPER VILLAIN OF THE OZARKS!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

SPRINGFIELD MUSIC LEGEND BENNY MAHAN DIES

Unfortunately, I never had a chance to see him perform live, but I've heard some recordings of his. I also recognize his name from countless marquees in Springfield during my youth. Local music legend Benny Mahan died over the weekend at age 65. The Springfield News Leader had a nice article Sunday on "The Local King" or music.

I also want to point you in the direction of a post on the Queen City Roller blog. It was posted about Benny Mahan on Saturday.

Tuesday evening, several people on Facebook mentioned his passing. A short time later, KSPR's Joe Daues mentioned he had talked to the family who said Benny Mahan was not dead but in the hospital. I didn't hear anymore, so I posted a message on Art Morris' Missouri Radio Message Board in hopes of hearing from someone who knew how he was doing. I had to keep bumping it because of the clogger/trolls that I mentioned in my previous post.

For some reason the subject of rock and roll and the local music scene upsets the clogger/trolls (They tend to listen to radio stations that don't play music), however, I received an e-mail on Friday from a friend of Benny Mahan's.

"It seems he had multiple bypass surgery on Monday and came through that ok. Sometime after that he had some plaque come loose in the arteries to his brain and suffered a series of mini strokes. He is in ICU and the prognosis is not too promising. Benny has a great love of life and hopefully his love of life will pull him through this. He certainly could use all the prayers you could say for him and if you're not a believer then just think positive and hopefully that will help pull him through this."

On Saturday, I contacted this person about the e-mail and they informed me that Benny Mahan had passed away.

I'm going to allow comments on this post for fans of Benny Mahan's. I will post them as soon as I can get them while screening out the trolls (I'm the unpopular one, not Benny). Also, you could post a message in the thread on the Missouri Radio Message Board (You will have to register).

THE LEGEND OF SHEBBA THE BELLY DANCER

This post on my blog has been over a year in the making. I had to go look through some of the old News Leaders and Daily News on microfilm at the Springfield Library Center to find the information I was looking for. It was in regards to a person known to many as "Shebba the Belly Dancer." When I was small, I remember that stories on the KY 3 6 o'clock news about "Shebba" sparked chuckles from my parents, but I also remember that the laughter stopped when "Shebba" took her own life. That name was stuck in the back of my brain for years, but I didn't know what it was that "Shebba" did.

Some of the info came from the memories of some veteran news people here in town, but most of it came from newspaper articles. I will not give her real name out of respect for any living family members. Also the photo above is not "Shebba" but a generic belly dancer.

"Shebba the Belly Dancer" first came to the attention of Ozarkers in 1977, when she asked to refuse her a place to display information of the benefits of belly dancing and how to get involved in belly dancing classes. City fathers thought she was going to be belly dancing in the courthouse. This spawned several visits to Springfield city council meetings where Shebba railed against the city council members for not listening to her when she tried to tell them what she wanted to do (They did allow her to set up a display with brochures in the courthouse rotunda).

The next time folks heard of her was when she showed up a city council meeting where a group called Springfield Council Against Pornography was pushing a tough anti-porn ordinance. Shebba told everyone that she recognized the preacher heading the anti-porn group as a man, who had tried to hire her and her dance troupe to perform a "nude fire dance" for a party with some of his male friends and possibly make some "films." The preacher resigned his position as head of the group. He didn't admit to Shebba's charges, but said the accusation drew too much attention to him (Some locals say that Shebba's accusations held water - one long- time Springfieldian referred to this as a "Baptist Boogie Nights").

The next month, Shebba had a scuffle at her home with Springfield PD when they came with a search warrant. It was believed that Shebba and her husband had reported a burglary and vandalizing of the home earlier. The police came to search for evidence that she had damaged the home herself as part of an insurance fraud scheme. This began a succession of assault charges, court appearances, police visits and fights with neighbors. One neighbor claimed that she tried to shoot him. She was charged with firing a gun into a building (she died before this went to trial).

In the middle of all of this, she would frequently call members of the media to tell them about the benefits of belly dancing and the "evils" of the Springfield city council and police department. One Springfieldian remembers that she once performed a sabre dance on the porch of the police department, facing Chestnut Expressway, and knocked the P & O off of the side of the building with her sabre, so it read "SPRINGFIELD LICE HEADQUARTERS."

Shebba's neighbors asked Mayor Paul Redfern to have her locked up. In August of 1978, she went to jail before being sent to Park Central Hospital for psychiatric evaluation. While on a weekend furlough from the hospital, she went back to her old neighborhood and walked around shouting "SHEBBA IS BACK!"
One of the neighbors snitched to the Assistant Greene County Prosecutor, who revoked her furloughs. A judge, shortly thereafter, ordered Shebba to be transferred to the State Mental Hospital in Fulton. While waiting for her transfer, she hung herself in a closet with a bed sheet.

The News Leader tried to interview neighbors, but many would not speak to the reporter. One neighbor, who said she never had problems with Shebba, blamed the other neighbors and the assistant prosecutor. Shebba's psychiatrist said he thought the prosecutor's office was over zealous, while the prosecutor's office said they believed that she was "a threat to the community."

A neighbor was quoted in the News Leader as saying "We didn't want her to die." It was a sad ending to a story that started with the same recurring theme that all problems start with - the Ozarker's repressed sexuality and there need to find "an enemy." Was Shebba "a threat to the community" or just to her nosy neighbors? Only God knows that.

The community has a problem with thinking that someone is "the enemy" or "a threat" to "the good life we have in the Ozarks." If Shebba was such "a threat" how come only those who dealt with her in someway remember the details and some of those feel she got raw treatment. Most current Springfieldian's have never heard of her and even some old timers memories of her are vague as to what she did.

I'm sure some people will be upset by this post. They will go into the entomology of some of the words I used in this piece or find a neighbor who "still has nightmares about Shebba" or call me "an unpleasant coward" because I "call people names" (That is like the pot calling the kettle black).

You might say Shebba the Belly Dancer was the original SUPER-VILLAIN OF THE OZARKS!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

DOES SPRINGFIELD STINK?

I want to address something that is not being talked about on either KSGF or KWTO. It's something that is not being written about in the News Leader. None of the TV stations have reported on this. I going to say this delicately yet in terminology that even a small child could understand: SPRINGFIELD SMELLS LIKE POTTY.

The area where it stinks the most is Sunshine and Highway 65. However, in the last week I have noticed this stink now covers an area from Sunshine and Hwy 65 to about Battlefield and Lone Pine.

It is obviously a problem with the city sewage system that needs to be fixed. It is really bad on hot days. I'm sure some of our typical Springfield cranks will start in with the old "It-will-cost-the-taxpayers-money" garbage they start in with when any improvements are needed in the city. Think about this folks, DO WE WANT OUR TOWN TO SMELL LIKE A TOILET? Something is wrong and it needs to be fixed.

I HATE THAT "CHICKEN FRIED" SONG

This is something I have to say, because it is a major problem in the Springfield community that must be addressed. This should be off concern to many patrons of local restaurants with juke boxes. It is people who insist on playing that stupid "Chicken Fried" by the Zac Brown Band. This has to be ONE OF THE WORST SONGS EVER RECORDED, yet there is a group of people in this town that insist on playing this song on the juke box the minute they walk in an establishment. It seems to be the same people every time. They are either a gang of rednecks (no surprise), a group of plus-sized women in their twenties and, the most shocking of all, medical workers (or their folks who like to wear scrubs).

See when I go out to enjoy myself. I may be selfish but I like to hear music that makes me feel good. Some headbanging songs like "Action" by the Sweet, "Living After Midnight" by Judas Priest, "Anarchy for the U.K." the Sex Pistols, "Bark at the Moon" by Ozzy Osbourne or "The Boys Are Back In Town" by Thin Lizzy are great when you are knocking back a few cold beverages. I also will accept "I Kissed a Girl" or "If You Seek Amy," but NOT "THE CHICKEN FRIED" SONG! Let me also say I don't like to hear any "Cracklin Rosie" by Neil Diamond.

I don't understand the words to this song, but then again, I never understood the point of the lyrics of very many country songs when I was a dee-jay at a country station in Lebanon. Most of them are stupid. About the only songs I liked when I was at that country station was "Friends In Low Places," "Seminole Wind" and "Goodbye Earl." We didn't play any of these because the president of one of the local banks didn't like them. Since he was an advertiser we had to play what he wanted (Bankers make the worst advertisers because they try to boss the radio stations around - I hope President Obama does something to punish these capitalist goons).

I feel this "Chicken Fried" song needs to be banned from all juke boxes in Springfield. I'm calling on Mayor Jim O'Neal and city council to get behind this. I also feel that this should be addressed by the Highway Patrol because I CONSIDER ANYONE WHO PLAYS THAT "CHICKEN FRIED" SONG ON A JUKE BOX A DOMESTIC TERRORIST!

I realize will not be a popular opinion to hold, but that is what makes me SUPER VILLAIN OF THE OZARKS!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Ozarks Native/Steel Guitar Legend Tom Brumley Dead at 73

Tom Brumley, who played steel guitar with Buck Owens' Buckaroos and Rick Nelson's Stone Canyon Band passed away Tuesday in a San Antonio hospital, according to the Houston Chronicle. He had a heart attack a few days before. Tom is the son of Albert E. Brumley, who wrote many famous hymns such as "I'll Fly Away." Both are featured in The Ozarks Greatest Hits book by KTXR's Wayne Glenn. Brumley has family living in the area.

Springfield Has Plenty of Porn in 1978

This ad appeared in the Springfield Daily News in 1978.

Desdinova's New Years Resolutions for 2009

My New Years Resolutions for 2009 include:

1. Post something on this blog that will cause both KSGF's Vincent David Jericho and KWTO's Chuck Booms to explode simultaneously.


2. Have some bonehead write a letter to the News Leader about me.


3. Marry Paris Hilton.


4. Change one of the local country or talk stations into a hot Top 40 station.


5. Take over the world. Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHA!
   
   

1959 XMAS in Springfield News Leader

These ads are from Christmas time 1959. They're for a chain of drug/variety stores called Cranks that were in Springfield. We hear about how "perfect" the 1950's were for family values.

These ads feature the use of "Xmas." I also notice that these stores in the 50's ran specials every week on women's panties and Milk of Magnesia. I wonder if there was a connection.

KY 3's Fred Miller Passes Away

If you grew up in the Ozarks, you remember Fred Miller and his OP art-flashing-animated weather map on KY 3. Mr. Miller died this morning at age 86. He was a weather man on KYTV from 1961 to 1995. Here is KY 3's tribute complete with some great video (watch for the help he gives Joe Hickman on sports).

Character Actor From Aurora Dies: Don S. Davis was 65

You probably saw the face but didn't know his name. You also may not have known he was from Aurora and attended SMSU (MSU to you kids) for a short time in the mid-sixties. Don S. Dixon, best known for his roles on the TV shows Twin Peaks and Stargate SG-1, died Sunday of a heart attack at his home in Gibsons, British Columbia. Here is the news report from Canwest News Service.

Here is a very good obit and tribute from the Stargate fans site, as well as his IMDB listing.

If You Don't Agree With Sarah Overstreet On This One, You Can Drown Yourself

I know I have given Sarah Overstreet a hard time about a few of her columns, but her column in Sunday's News Leader was about one of my big complaints about Springfield - the flooding problem during the rains. I have complained about the streets flooding during the slightest rainstorm since 1987. Usually, falling on deaf ears or having some Ozarker tell me "We don't want to pay the taxes to fix it."

My parents attended a funeral here in town on June 13th. It rain quite a bit that day. They told me they would never again doubt me when I said the streets of Springfield flood when it rains.

Sarah suggest that the resistance needs to stop: "The scenario again is as follows: Old infrastructure, lots of old and new problems to be fixed, and virtually no funds in comparison to need. If you care about your fellow citizens and don't want to see them crying outside their houses and picked up by fire-and-rescue units, you're going to have to give up some greenbacks. It won't be much per resident, but we've got to push the issue and be willing to follow it up with "yes" votes.

This is one time where the "we already pay too much taxes" argument just doesn't wash. Don't want to help? Tell that to the guy sitting in the pew with you next Sunday, who's been up all night with a bucket bailing out his basement."

Of course, in the comment under this column on the website, some idiot is claiming the photos of flooding where "doctored" by the News Leader. Well, then there are doctored photos on the TV station websites and well as the Remembering Springfield MySpace site. There is a photo over at Ebbett's Field of a guy kayaking down Walnut Street.

Ms. Overstreet says she will have more articles on this in the coming weeks. Good. Here is MY suggestion if you feel as strongly about this as I do.

1. Carry a whiffle ball bat with you on the days we have rain.
2. Bring up the streets flooding in conversation.
3. If someone tells you that it will cost tax payers money and we pay too much taxes to fix it, you have Desdinova's permission to HIT THEM UPSIDE THE HEAD WITH THE WHIFFLE BALL BAT! Or you could...
4. Take them outside to the nearest flooded area and "baptise them" until the "believe" we need to overhaul the drainage system. Or...
5. Just ask them the old Bill Cosby line, "How long can you tread water?"

What is it going to take to solve this problem? Loss of property or life. How long can we tread water?